In therapy the therapist works with the client to grow self-awareness, which is part of the process of gradually increasing self worth. The therapist hears and values the client and what the client brings, which is sometimes complex and time consuming work.  To be repeatedly not heard or responded to often results in a hiding away of thoughts and feelings, or put another way, a hiding away of the real self, without sometimes even being aware of doing this.  A child or adult may have developed a way of being in the world that is about changing aspects of themselves in order to fit with others. These things are best understood as protective measures, so as not to feel the hurt or humiliation etc that comes with being not heard or understood, or in some cases, to avoid the risk of physical harm.  These are all carefully worked on in therapy, to gradually bring to light what may not have been previously known, understood or valued.

The prevailing approach to improving self-esteem is commonly a cognitive one, focusing on identity issues and developing strategies around goals and achievements. This technique may improve feelings about oneself in the short term, but very often this does not last and very soon there is a return to negative feelings. The psychotherapeutic approach to improve self-esteem suggested in this article is more holistic.  This may mean it takes a little longer to achieve the changes sought, however, once changes occur they are more likely to be enduring over time.

All the therapists at Talking Therapy are experienced in working with self-esteem issues.  Phone 03 3548045 or email This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it. to make an appointment.